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But for me, it was love. It felt like love. Or the closest I've ever come to love. And I wanted to say thank you. For that. Mary's been sleeping with strangers across Scotland for eight months. Tonight's conquest: Mike, an American tourist who's never heard of KFC. After the best sex of her life, she tells him what she’s been hiding. Then he tells her what he’s been hiding. An explosive two-hander from award-winning writer David Ireland (The Fifth Step; Cyprus Avenue) that offers a sharp and hilarious exploration of faith and loneliness in a Travelodge. This edition was published to coincide with the run at Soho Theatre, London, in December 2025.